I Hid Myself, Because I Was Afraid, Insecure, and Real Angry

I had a hard time believing that I could truly have something I desired.

It was a useless endeavor to have dreams,  to set goals.  

Nothing good seemed to come to me, and when I took something good, it left.  

I lived in a dark and gruesome vacuum.

I was angry and alone. 

The darkness and the anger were deep; all consuming.

A moment of pleasure or joy not recognized, not acknowledged.

I considered my self unworthy of being a human being.

I thought I needed someone to say to me that I had done well.  That I was not garbage.

I needed encouragement to be and to do.  

Encouragement to come to Life.  I was dead within. 

When encouragement came I couldn’t hear it.

A soul lost in darkness.

Haunted by the past, regrets, failures, and insecurities.

Making up a false outside to keep anyone from noticing the bleeding.

Show them I was fine.

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