Some things are just different now, you know?
When I knew you before, I was sure I could not live without you loving me.
I swear I believed that from the absolute very first moment I saw you!
I knew at that very moment that I would do anything whatsoever to make a way for you to love me.
I also knew that I loved you so hard and so much, that the most terrible thing in my world would be for you to not love me.
I loved you like I had never imagined loving in my wildest imaginations of love and life. The love and the need to be yours blinded me.
I didn’t, and I do not have a word or a name or a particular quality that identifies why I hold this deep and abiding affection for you.
Still!
But we were younger then……..
Here’s what I would like you to know today:
I am still overwhelmed with how much I just like you. I mean I like the way you talk and the things you say, and how you say them. I like you because you like to go to the ocean so much.
I could care less if there was an ocean: except that it makes you feel so good..
I like the way you smile, and the way you hold yourself.
I am overcome with the way you look.
But I like the way you are mature and go to work every day, and I like how people like you.
I like that you are strong willed, and soft at the same time. That you are so easy to love and to like.
I love you from a different place than I know about love,
and I like you the most
But
There are a lot of reasons why I can’t have you, and I’m ok with that for a lot of reasons.
We tried but we couldn’t.
It was so long ago on the calendar, yet only today in my heart.
I was so sad for so long, but no more.
I am just as much elated that I know you
as I was to be desperately in love with you.
Life moves on, somehow.