I AM NOT MY SHEPHERD!
My very greatest chore and obligation is to
STOP ACTING LIKE I AM MY OWN SHEPHERD!
The Lord is my shepherd; I shall not want.
He maketh me to lie down in green patures: He leadeth beside the still waters.
He restoreth my soul: He leadeth me in the paths of righteousness FOR HIS NAME’S SAKE.
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.
Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over.
Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of Lord for ever.
I’ve come to realize that my biggest struggle is trying to lead myself instead of trusting the Lord to shepherd me.
I keep acting like I know what’s best, but I don’t.
He’s the one who restores my soul, leads me to peace, and walks with me through every dark valley. I want to stop pretending I’m in control and fully rest in His guidance—for His name’s sake.
And the only way I’ve found to do that is by trying my best of think of God all day long. I’m talking about moment by moment, no matter what I’m doing.
And so far it doesn’t really seem impossible, but quite the challenge. All I can do is to “labor” to train my mind to come back to Him every time it comes to me that I’ve left Him. Then I can thank Him for allowing me to come back, and apologize that I left (in my mind) to think about something else.
He’s gracious to take me back and continue on loving me as I learn to love Him with all of my heart, mind and soul.